July 09, 2005
a distant me
this morning i woke at 4 am since i had to open at starbucks at 5:15A. I ended up getting out of bed around 5:00A. negotiations had been made with my black belled alarm clock. when i finally turned on the light and looked at the wall clock i noticed i had been sleeping with the alarm clock. i have this wierd habit of turning it off and holding it while i sleep.
i had 15 min. to get ready for work. my nice old navy polo was not washed yet. so had grabbed another white polo that had a large coffee stain by the buttons. i looked in the mirror. i looked like crap. wow, have i ever been uglier? i asked myself. my face was so white. my eyes demanded slumber. cold water: splash, splash, then again. however, to no avail.
i walked in. mow let me in. there were only lights on by the bar. talisha looked at me, "what are you doing here?"
"to open," I responded.
"anna never called you then, cuz she just changed the schedule the other day."
next thing i knew i was stumbling back to the minivan, holding a grande skim latte.
5:45 sitting in the car in the driveway, listening to the radio music. lights are going on in the basement. mom is walking around. 5:55 listening to 99.5. I hate this station because of 1. the repetitive style music, 2. the kind of people who i can imagine listening to it, and 3. the whole blind stupidity of every song.
Went to the house and dropped into me bed. i was so cold and cozy. my back evaporated on the mattress. this is around 6 am. just when i was falling asleep. piano music, abrupt, loud, and definitive starts. joel is home. joel has strong fingers. piano fingers. voices. he brought someone home with him. talk about breaking 12 am curfew. it's 6! i tell mom i'm trying to sleep. the piano stops. then a guitar starts strumming. the piano starts going again. joel is tuning the guitar, with the piano. i give up.
drifting, not sleeping.
i can barely remember what i dream about...
i'm in another land. i think it's japan. they are speaking in japanese. they are looking for us. we are running away from them. on motorcycles. they keep coming so close. one night we hide in the countryside and stay with a friend who is a farmer. we are christians. somehow that is illegal, and they are the hand of the law. they have uniforms, like soldiers/cops. our farmer friend is found out. he is killed and we go to the mountains. the intense wilderness from ikego. except that it is vaster. so many hillside i can recall scraping along on. somehow the chase ends up in front of a huge hospital run by either midwives or nuns. the front entrance is for the ER. we scream. well, i do. a lady comes out and says, "This entrance is only for emergencys, and extremely injured people." I say, "we are, take us in." about 7 nuns run around and take us in, they take us in strechers, or we are just escorted in. the bad guys are left outside, gaping. as soon as we are inside the white doors we depart from the nuns. our group leader says, "we must hurry before they figure out what's going on and come in to get us." i run to the girl's bathroom, to shower and then stay in the hospital for the night. this hospital is looking more and more like a clean dorm. it's a mass bathroom, like a warehouse. makes me think of the holocaust. an alarm rings. they have gotten inside. i run... and that's as far as i can remember.
i had 15 min. to get ready for work. my nice old navy polo was not washed yet. so had grabbed another white polo that had a large coffee stain by the buttons. i looked in the mirror. i looked like crap. wow, have i ever been uglier? i asked myself. my face was so white. my eyes demanded slumber. cold water: splash, splash, then again. however, to no avail.
i walked in. mow let me in. there were only lights on by the bar. talisha looked at me, "what are you doing here?"
"to open," I responded.
"anna never called you then, cuz she just changed the schedule the other day."
next thing i knew i was stumbling back to the minivan, holding a grande skim latte.
5:45 sitting in the car in the driveway, listening to the radio music. lights are going on in the basement. mom is walking around. 5:55 listening to 99.5. I hate this station because of 1. the repetitive style music, 2. the kind of people who i can imagine listening to it, and 3. the whole blind stupidity of every song.
Went to the house and dropped into me bed. i was so cold and cozy. my back evaporated on the mattress. this is around 6 am. just when i was falling asleep. piano music, abrupt, loud, and definitive starts. joel is home. joel has strong fingers. piano fingers. voices. he brought someone home with him. talk about breaking 12 am curfew. it's 6! i tell mom i'm trying to sleep. the piano stops. then a guitar starts strumming. the piano starts going again. joel is tuning the guitar, with the piano. i give up.
drifting, not sleeping.
i can barely remember what i dream about...
i'm in another land. i think it's japan. they are speaking in japanese. they are looking for us. we are running away from them. on motorcycles. they keep coming so close. one night we hide in the countryside and stay with a friend who is a farmer. we are christians. somehow that is illegal, and they are the hand of the law. they have uniforms, like soldiers/cops. our farmer friend is found out. he is killed and we go to the mountains. the intense wilderness from ikego. except that it is vaster. so many hillside i can recall scraping along on. somehow the chase ends up in front of a huge hospital run by either midwives or nuns. the front entrance is for the ER. we scream. well, i do. a lady comes out and says, "This entrance is only for emergencys, and extremely injured people." I say, "we are, take us in." about 7 nuns run around and take us in, they take us in strechers, or we are just escorted in. the bad guys are left outside, gaping. as soon as we are inside the white doors we depart from the nuns. our group leader says, "we must hurry before they figure out what's going on and come in to get us." i run to the girl's bathroom, to shower and then stay in the hospital for the night. this hospital is looking more and more like a clean dorm. it's a mass bathroom, like a warehouse. makes me think of the holocaust. an alarm rings. they have gotten inside. i run... and that's as far as i can remember.
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